How to Talk with your Child about an Evaluation!
It is very normal and very common for a child to need an educational assessment or another form of developmental/ psychological assessment as they are growing up. Sometimes they are tested because there are negative concerns present, other times it is more of a routine check, but it is never anything to worry about beforehand.
One common concern is that children will feel negatively about themselves if they know they are being assessed for something. This short article will cover how to help your child make sure to do their best and feel their best when being assessed without becoming self-conscious.
First, if it has been recommended or advised that your child complete assessments, they are probably already struggling and the assessments are only to help. We would never complete a long assessment process if it was not deemed helpful and necessary by a lot of factors. If your child is struggling in school and the teacher recommends an assessment, it is to help them receive better and more personalized education. It is never to punish them or because they are doing something wrong. It's important to let the child know that they will receive help and soon because of these tests, because they are likely aware enough to know they are struggling and need help.
Second, when explaining to your child that they are going to be taking assessments, perhaps try letting them know that they are to help them. Let them know there is no right or wrong answers in the assessments, as there are not. There is no failing them, and they should not be worried about “doing well” on them. It is important that none of the assessments be practiced or explained to the child before hand, as that can skew and sometimes cause the results to become inconclusive. It can be more helpful to walk them through breathing exercises and focusing techniques rather than “studying”. It is also important that if you would like to reward them for their work in the assessments, you reward them for completion and not results.
Lastly, it is important that results not be shared with your children without careful consideration. A child may not understand what their numbers mean on, let's say an IQ test, when they are younger. But as they get older, if they remember that number, they may end up wrongly thinking they are less capable because of it. As a flipside, they may begin thinking they should be capable of more if their score is considered high, causing them undue stress and pressure. The scores are just numbers and should be treated as such- but a child may not understand that and may feel negatively about their scores if given the wrong context or information. The complexities of the brain should never be categorized into a single number anyways. Perhaps it is best to let your child know they did well without giving them specifics unless you are sure they can handle it or it is beneficial to them.
If they are diagnosed with something, as a different example, choosing how to tell them, how much, and when is crucial. Making sure that they know they will be supported in whatever it may be, and that there is nothing “wrong” with them, is also very important. The clinician giving the assessment can help you with talking to your child about their results and diagnoses in a mindful way, and may recommend therapy for managing the diagnosis and learning to adapt to it.
Our assessments here at Birch are well thought out and standardized to make sure that every test been given is necessary and could be helpful in supporting your child. We do an initial clinical interview where we go over every assessment in our tentative plan with you and talk about how the results could be helpful. We will never recommend more testing than is necessary and we will make sure to give enough testing that there can be comprehensive and helpful results. Following the testing, we provide an hour long feedback session where we go over all of their results with you and make specific recommendations on how to best help them in the school and home settings. That may look like an individualized education plan, potential medication, therapy, or other support. If you think that your child could benefit from one of our assessments, feel free to reach out today and I would be happy to explain more! At the end of the day, all that matters is that you and your child are happy, healthy, and well cared for.
Kyndal Sims
Birch Psychology
